we won debate for zon bangsar! yay! happiness is of course, guaranteed but is it really? i'm not really sure. i just want to.... escape all of this for a while.
debate's fine. i dont mind it, i like it. pei hsia <3 fikri <3 ashraf <3 are awesome to talk to but i can't help myself thinking and totally zoning out sometimes to think about my studies. yeah, got back my results for mid year exams. 8As 1B, or more specifically, 6 A1s 2A2s 1B3. i swear to god, i was sooo PISSED when i discovered that i got a B for add maths, after all that bloody studying... that's it???
i mean, i get add maths but practicing maths is just not really something i DO and thats the MAJOR problem. i hate myself. urgh god i hate myself sooo much right now.
my whole family's being like totally..... inconvenient right now with their reaction to my grades. "why didn't you get straight A1s???" "you should be getting straight A1s!!"
god, give me some space! the fact that i even juggle all of these stuff and not go to tuition, and study on my own, 8As and 1B is not THAT bad right? right? urgh, you see, i don't think so because i'm just so convinced by my family that that's not good enough. its just so frustrating, i mean, i would like, just a little bit of... recognition for it. thats the problem with my family.
no recognition at all. the B just overshadows everything.
haih. i mean...... wateverlah. she never gets it. i cant wait to leave high school and go to college and seriously, just being free to do what i want in my life. MY life. not yours to dictate, its mine.
huh. :P my debate team has to be THE RANDOM-EST team ever. lol. i love them very much so :D
BIG LOVE <3>for the SMKSH DEBATE TEAM!!!
i do not know where i'd be without you guys!
probably crying every night of my life : /
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